[ A small, somber smile plays on her lips. She's been wondering about her own personal investment in the War Hounds ever since she and Cen flew back from Tokyo.
Kaz is easy: he reminds her so much of herself that it's second-nature to reach out to the boy. It helps, she supposes, that Neeka's grandson has since sought her out and opened up to her about things that run parallel to her own personal experiences.
With Yulia, it's a little bit more indulgent. ]
Remember when we first spoke?
I was on the lawn with Aidan before Rethe came along and I walked over to join you.
[ That's a good look on you, Bostova. You should smile more.
She kills her cigarette on her tin; lights a fresh one up. ]
No, I didn't. [ She's filing that away as well, calibrating how to go about your training. Anyway-- ]
Remember how I said that one of my best friends was a Bladian? [ Her talk with Deirdra had given her things to think about -- things she hadn't had time to think through while occupied during the latter part of the Darkest Vigil; things she'd shelved once they'd hit the Armistice at Blaece and she, Cen, her kids and everyone else could finally take time to breathe. ]
I was talking about Lars Hartzler.
[ There was Hikaru, too. But... she can get to tha at another time. ]
He was the other Bladian in the Rockin' Rollas. And my second really good friend from that blade.
She's watching the embers on the edge of her cigarette now, and when she speaks again, it's soft and sad: ] Yeah. He did.
[ She takes a puff; gently exhales the smoke and watches it dissipate into the air. ]
I never got to help him, though. Or to say goodbye.
[ She'd learned about Lars' passing two weeks after coming home and finally after settling in as best as she could. She'd gone around, had mustered the courage to seek out Henry only to learn that Lars had passed away, and all the events that had led up to that passing.
Funny how she'd always thought that they would have a longer run. He'd been the one to tell her after all, that once they won the fight with Nyx ( not 'if', but 'when', his exact word choice at the time ) they would all live long and happy lives.
She lifts a hand then, fingers curled, to her lips.
Deirdra was right. She still carried the guilt of it. Sure, she'd made her peace, and she also ensured that part of her hunter's earnings went to funding the hospital down in the Visayas -- Lars' dream, given the kind of doctor that he had been. ]
[ She pauses to look at that hand on her shoulder, and then smiles when you give her words back to her. ]
It's a hard thing to do, though. Isn't it?
[ Lifting her cigarette now to her lips, the faintest tremor in her fingers before she takes a steadying puff. ]
They hit his dream. Grendel, I mean.
At the end of Nyx, he told us about the hospital he wanted to set up, one that wouldn't care what conspiracy or compact you were from. [ Her voice goes soft. ] If you needed help and they could give it, their doors were always open.
You'd think we would be safe. That this country wouldn't feel it as much. But they hit the hospital, and... he would have gone into Rapture for that if it weren't for Hikaru's interference.
[ Falling quiet now, looking back down at that cigarette. ] I'm just glad that Miriam and the kids turned out okay after that. But I still miss that idiot.
[ Her shoulders shake a little, but she takes one very deep breath and gets herself back together. ]
I think, [ She starts, leaning back on her hands on the steps. She looks at Cisco, head tilted just slightly to block the bright sunlight. ] it is only natural for you to feel that way because you cared a lot for him. For them.
And besides. [ If the blue of her eyes were cold before, it's even colder now. ] Grendal doesn't discriminate. They destroy anything, everything they get their hands on. [ Of course she knows; she's seen it happen so many times. ]
[ The ice in her gaze melts into a mix of fear, sadness. She looks away, releasing a breath that makes her shoulders shake. ]
It wasn't easy, you know? The first few years after Zangyaku, after the Blade King drove Grendal away from my town. Sometimes I would still wake up, thinking that it would be the day they take me away.
Someone taught me how to chase them away. [ She smiles, fond yet sad. It makes her light up again; Cisco would notice it, has seen it before, the way she's so careful with that Zippo of hers. ]
[ She's noting the lighter, the stylized 'M' engraved into the metal, the way Yulia carries it around with such care. But stories as heavy as that are often personal, and while Cisco is an optimist who is rather big on talking, there are things that she understands, that take time. ]
That's good to hear.
[ She'll shift gears for now, give the girl an out. Rising, she stretches, and then looks over to the Russian. ]
[ Her eyebrows meet and make a confused, curious line. As far as she knew, The Fort was a place of clubs and bars. Surely they wouldn't be open at a time like this...? ]
[ Have a smile, Bostova. One that puts to mind a mischievous fox, even if this one hasn't changed in the least. ]
You'll see.
[ Cisco's leading you to her car ( it's my husband's, borrowed it for the day because I like how smoothly it moves on the road ) which she uses to zip you both down to The Fort for what appears to be less of training and more of a girl's day out.
You'll note that she looks like a regular at the establishments she takes you to -- people greet her warmly, seem to anticipate her needs, making things go smooth. You're also making stops to the strip of bars in one area, at which people greet her like an old friend, and to whom she readily introduces you as her little sister.
You're kicking back at a coffeeshop along a place she refers to as "High Street" some two, three hours later, and you'll hear her speak right into your mind as soon as she catches you eye when you settle down at one of the tables outside with a few shopping bags -- yours, hers.
[ Oops, she's only ever used to speaking to her sister in her head. She probably missed the fact that Cisco didn't even open her lips to speak with her.
The day's been overwhelming, too. She hasn't walked, talked, and (politely) laughed as much as she has today in what felt like ages. And while she'd shopped with Tala before, the experience with Cisco is different. Tala was a whirlwind; Cisco? Still a huge gust of wind.
It was... fun. It reminded her a little of Norway and Ingrid (although Ingrid would insist on stopping every now and then to take pictures of plants, stray animals and the two of them over coffee). ]
[ She's just going to grin at that. It's essentially how Mindspeech works. Hers to yours and back again, at least until she gets a little too far or breaks eye-contact. ]
Gotcha. You relax, have a cigarette, I'm going to go grab us drinks.
[ She doesn't wait for you to reply before she flounces off. You'll likely see her rock back on her heels and grin out some response to the barista because there's a short line and she's happy to wait her turn. ]
[ She smiles, lights a cigarette, and watches Cisco. The way she moves, the way she talks to the barista, the way she's not exactly keeping still in the line at the counter.
A second barista comes around though, and she's distracted for the moment.
Not five minutes later, she's coming back out and setting down the little electronic coaster thing and two cups of water on the table. ]
Sorry that took a while. [ She settles down and fishes around her bag for a hairtie that she sets between her lips as she's sweeping her hair up in a ponytail. When she's done though: ] They're pretty busy today.
[ Yes, all of this is normal. Weren't you supposed to be learning Whisperer things? ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ It's not that she isn't fine with this, but she's curious. Cisco doesn't have to go out of her way to do this, but she is. ]
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Kaz is easy: he reminds her so much of herself that it's second-nature to reach out to the boy. It helps, she supposes, that Neeka's grandson has since sought her out and opened up to her about things that run parallel to her own personal experiences.
With Yulia, it's a little bit more indulgent. ]
Remember when we first spoke?
I was on the lawn with Aidan before Rethe came along and I walked over to join you.
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You came up to me asking for a light. [ A tilt of her head, and gives Cisco a smile. ]
Pretty sure you didn't need it, but you asked anyway.
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She kills her cigarette on her tin; lights a fresh one up. ]
No, I didn't. [ She's filing that away as well, calibrating how to go about your training. Anyway-- ]
Remember how I said that one of my best friends was a Bladian? [ Her talk with Deirdra had given her things to think about -- things she hadn't had time to think through while occupied during the latter part of the Darkest Vigil; things she'd shelved once they'd hit the Armistice at Blaece and she, Cen, her kids and everyone else could finally take time to breathe. ]
I was talking about Lars Hartzler.
[ There was Hikaru, too. But... she can get to tha at another time. ]
He was the other Bladian in the Rockin' Rollas. And my second really good friend from that blade.
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Mm... You told me he felt guilty. About not being able to... help you.
[ She remembers that from their conversation a few months ago. ]
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She's watching the embers on the edge of her cigarette now, and when she speaks again, it's soft and sad: ] Yeah. He did.
[ She takes a puff; gently exhales the smoke and watches it dissipate into the air. ]
I never got to help him, though. Or to say goodbye.
[ She'd learned about Lars' passing two weeks after coming home and finally after settling in as best as she could. She'd gone around, had mustered the courage to seek out Henry only to learn that Lars had passed away, and all the events that had led up to that passing.
Funny how she'd always thought that they would have a longer run. He'd been the one to tell her after all, that once they won the fight with Nyx ( not 'if', but 'when', his exact word choice at the time ) they would all live long and happy lives.
She lifts a hand then, fingers curled, to her lips.
Deirdra was right. She still carried the guilt of it. Sure, she'd made her peace, and she also ensured that part of her hunter's earnings went to funding the hospital down in the Visayas -- Lars' dream, given the kind of doctor that he had been. ]
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Comfort isn't her strong suit, but... ]
Maybe you should follow your own advice.
"Don't let your guilt eat you."
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It's a hard thing to do, though. Isn't it?
[ Lifting her cigarette now to her lips, the faintest tremor in her fingers before she takes a steadying puff. ]
They hit his dream. Grendel, I mean.
At the end of Nyx, he told us about the hospital he wanted to set up, one that wouldn't care what conspiracy or compact you were from. [ Her voice goes soft. ] If you needed help and they could give it, their doors were always open.
You'd think we would be safe. That this country wouldn't feel it as much. But they hit the hospital, and... he would have gone into Rapture for that if it weren't for Hikaru's interference.
[ Falling quiet now, looking back down at that cigarette. ] I'm just glad that Miriam and the kids turned out okay after that. But I still miss that idiot.
[ Her shoulders shake a little, but she takes one very deep breath and gets herself back together. ]
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And besides. [ If the blue of her eyes were cold before, it's even colder now. ] Grendal doesn't discriminate. They destroy anything, everything they get their hands on. [ Of course she knows; she's seen it happen so many times. ]
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When she speaks again, she's looking down at the cracks on the ground. ]
Who did they take?
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[ The ice in her gaze melts into a mix of fear, sadness. She looks away, releasing a breath that makes her shoulders shake. ]
It wasn't easy, you know? The first few years after Zangyaku, after the Blade King drove Grendal away from my town. Sometimes I would still wake up, thinking that it would be the day they take me away.
I still had nightmares, even at Jotunheim.
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And now?
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Someone taught me how to chase them away. [ She smiles, fond yet sad. It makes her light up again; Cisco would notice it, has seen it before, the way she's so careful with that Zippo of hers. ]
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That's good to hear.
[ She'll shift gears for now, give the girl an out. Rising, she stretches, and then looks over to the Russian. ]
First order of training. Let's go to the Fort.
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Why there?
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You'll see.
[ Cisco's leading you to her car ( it's my husband's, borrowed it for the day because I like how smoothly it moves on the road ) which she uses to zip you both down to The Fort for what appears to be less of training and more of a girl's day out.
You'll note that she looks like a regular at the establishments she takes you to -- people greet her warmly, seem to anticipate her needs, making things go smooth. You're also making stops to the strip of bars in one area, at which people greet her like an old friend, and to whom she readily introduces you as her little sister.
You're kicking back at a coffeeshop along a place she refers to as "High Street" some two, three hours later, and you'll hear her speak right into your mind as soon as she catches you eye when you settle down at one of the tables outside with a few shopping bags -- yours, hers.
( Coffee or tea, sweetheart? My treat. ) ]
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[ Oops, she's only ever used to speaking to her sister in her head. She probably missed the fact that Cisco didn't even open her lips to speak with her.
The day's been overwhelming, too. She hasn't walked, talked, and (politely) laughed as much as she has today in what felt like ages. And while she'd shopped with Tala before, the experience with Cisco is different. Tala was a whirlwind; Cisco? Still a huge gust of wind.
It was... fun. It reminded her a little of Norway and Ingrid (although Ingrid would insist on stopping every now and then to take pictures of plants, stray animals and the two of them over coffee). ]
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Gotcha. You relax, have a cigarette, I'm going to go grab us drinks.
[ She doesn't wait for you to reply before she flounces off. You'll likely see her rock back on her heels and grin out some response to the barista because there's a short line and she's happy to wait her turn. ]
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[ She smiles, lights a cigarette, and watches Cisco. The way she moves, the way she talks to the barista, the way she's not exactly keeping still in the line at the counter.
It feels too normal, and it's... strange. ]
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She's also too far, so that'll be weird.
( What's up? ) ]
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Nothing, she sends back. Just watching you. ]
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She sounds pretty chipper.
A second barista comes around though, and she's distracted for the moment.
Not five minutes later, she's coming back out and setting down the little electronic coaster thing and two cups of water on the table. ]
Sorry that took a while. [ She settles down and fishes around her bag for a hairtie that she sets between her lips as she's sweeping her hair up in a ponytail. When she's done though: ] They're pretty busy today.
[ Yes, all of this is normal. Weren't you supposed to be learning Whisperer things? ]